July 31, 2005 - only water

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Everybody has a blade hidden in the pocket

He's been chased so he decided to scare the other

She's been frightened then she chose to discipline the weaker

Everybody has a fault buried in the mountain

They might lose it

To be safe, everybody has a dagger that might just kill the other

 

June 12, 2005 - Fantasy

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Seven more minutes, today will end

End quickly with a new fantasy, I used to despise them

Nothing changed much, but this world is no longer the same

I know, I just know

Two more minutes, the clock will ring

Ring gently from a distance, but the truth is it is close, like always

Magic is too far to reach, so I will keep my hands busy

I must, I know I must

Today never ends, yesterday never is

Tomorrow doesn't rely on wishes

1429 more minutes, today will end

But really... today never ends, nor does tomorrow rely on some fantasies

I know, now I know

 

June 5, 2005 - Legend

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Hang on to the edge of the world, dream what you dreamed of

It is clear water that left me

It was a stormy night that embraced you

A dream won't kill you, yet it deserted me

Whatever that means

 

Speak my heart, make a fool out of this world

Make a fool out of me

Without a crown

It is this eye who sees things blindly

 

Not a sandstorm, but a deadly breeze

 

It gets too hot, so it shuts down

 

June 4, 2005 - Myth

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My cold arms, will they keep you close by my side, always

 

As night falls, hearts and shadows disappear into rivers

I ran into mountains

 

Start a fire, burn all the stars

Bury a lie, cover it with our backs, lie on the grass

 

Wind blows

She cries, quietly in the mountains

He remembers, where her heart was, in the rivers

She remembers

 

Rain falls

He runs, hastily in the black woods

She sees, where he fell on his broken knees, his bleeding cuts

He sees

 

Say a promise, wait till I break it into shards of glass

 

May 22, 2005 - Nausicaa

When you fall into a poisonous forest, the deepest cave awaits. So don't be afraid to fall, you might find pure water still. Look up, you are not enclosed by danger, not threatened by the world, but admire the charming secrets you will. Mist, mist, mist. Light and mist.

 

May 16, 2005 - city of zombies

I gotta find her.

 

May 7, 2005 - under the same roof (part II)

I didn't know when a rabbit becomes too lonely, it dies. Hee, it's tough being a rabbit.

 

May 6, 2005 - under the same roof

It's one of those nights when I become uncertain about the future, troublesome thoughts like whether if I had made the best decisions about things. More importantly, how much am I willing to stick to the path I offered myself, how much do I truly know, how much do I want to know, blah blah, such uninteresting topics. And as usual, there's no one I can fully share this with, thus the whole situation always seems to be worse than it actually is. The truth is I am not that bothered... just thought I would fill out my black book for a bit until I am finally tired enough to go to bed again... well, whatever I say.

See, worries are gone already. I am truly a lazy person.

 

May 4, 2005 - no need for another poem

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说算了吧 算了

天底下有我这种傻瓜 对着破碎的陨石 以为是永恒的图画

 

说忘了吧 忘了

没理由再作假 嘴里的台词 念着 念着 说成了神话 笑话

 

说可以吗 可以吧

几千个瞬间的回答 几百个模糊的伤疤 几十个善意的谎话

 

还多出什么 会有什么

 

说算了吧 可以吗 忘了吗 可以吧

 

April 21, 2005 - I saw Jupiter

"If something isn't remembered by anyone, then it doesn't exist."

"Is it true?!"

 

April 17, 2005 - Day 4

I've seen Rodeo, been to Stockyards, seems to be a small town where all the cowboys go, and finished the entire plate of the famous Chicken Fried Steak. That was yesterday. I was too tired to turn on my computer.

 

April 14, 2005 - Day 1

17:47PM New Orleans: just arrived

Objective: spending the next two hours in the airport with an 1/5 empty Sprite bottle, my bag, cousin's laptop case and a newly set watch

Planning to do: look around unsuspectedly, blend into the crowd, and perhaps another Sprite bottle would be needed to maintain the current unspoiled status

What happened: someone who looked familiar had just passed by

Alright, I am shutting this off

 

April 3, 2005 - Tallgrass Prairie

If growing up is a process of finding out the truth about the world you care based on facts rather than feelings, then I'd say I had my lesson. If learning to accept whatever life hands you is an entry ticket of... somewhat, becoming a merrier person, then I'd be glad 'cause I found out about such truth.

I will always be a stubborn person who holds unreasonable beliefs, just like April will always be my most liked month of the year. No matter how wicked my mind gets, I still favor those who are important to me regardless. What I've gained is an empty space where I could take a step back so I would not fall blindly, a bottle of bitter-sweet cough drops which I could taste, thus to save myself from a cold someday.

 

March 6, 2005 - I've heard enough

If one has played "Silent Hill" and out of the blue, decides to capture all the surrounding sounds in this world just by listening carefully with both eyes closed (Shaka's style, perhaps), one might realize there are so many unnatural, unpleasant, and unnecessary noises. Well, at least that is my conclusion after the weekend. Unlike vision, hearing cannot be shut easily. Why is that? Maybe humans keep their hearing ability fully alert the entire time, so they wouldn't fall too deeply into their curious dreams.

The word I am looking for might be "meditation", however, what I'd just mentioned must be much simpler. I despise no noises that made me weak, but the voice in my head which had weaken itself.

Everything creates doubt. Being more precise, everything one cares creates doubt. Things I see, things I hear, things I touch... they often come back to haunt me in various ways whether if I am prepared or not. Sometimes I fail, sometimes I succeed, or sometimes, I just don't mind the consequences at all. In any case, the one thing that I cannot run away from is to face both sides of the mirror regardless.

Yes, and I've wrote enough for today.